Being on the run is terrifying. I could only bring what I could sneak out of our house without Damon and Penny noticing, so while I managed to empty my account on the way to meet Brandon, I was only able to bring a couple days worth of clothes, a couple books, and the LARPing weapons that were already in my car. I'm seriously considering finding a goodwill and trying to pick up a few more things, all of what I have is already pretty grimy. But money is going to be tight pretty soon so I can't quite justify it.
Brandon's been holding up pretty well, considering. Neither of us have come up with anything beyond 'run like the wind', but he's been so good to me... I'm not exactly the most stable right now. The day after we left, Damon and Penny called and told me that we were done. It shouldn't... it shouldn't bother me so damn much, I never expected anything else, but I... they've been so much a part of me, of my life, of everything I say or do, for so long...
I just feel lost. Thank God for Brandon, if I were on my own right now I couldn't... I couldn't do it. I just... I...
I should go before I start crying again.
Showing posts with label just run. Show all posts
Showing posts with label just run. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Friday, August 5, 2011
Gone
I need to do this in order, otherwise I'll just freak out again and this post will never go up. The date yesterday was great. Brandon is sweet and we honestly have a good time together. I ended up taking him with me to run errands, and so we spent like five hours together. Pretty good for the first date, yeah? So I was pretty much deliriously happy when I went home and made dinner for Penny and Damon.
And then I found this. And I have to be honest with you guys, I have to, I think Damon and Penny and Brandon are the only ones who read this and I can't lie to you. He's real, I'm so sorry. A few weeks ago, that wasn't a game that was real and I thought I'd gotten through it, I thought it would go away but when I read that post I turned and He was in the window and I screamed. I knew... I knew I had to leave, I had to save Damon and Penny, because they're good kind people and they've treated me so well and I love them and I don't want this happening to them.
He's real, and I had to run, and I couldn't take Damon and Penny, couldn't TELL Damon and Penny. They know, of course, because I'm not allowed to lie to them, but they haven't seen him yet, they're not being stalked, so there's still hope, so I need to leave. I left with Brandon last night.
Damon, Penny, I'm so sorry. I know I broke the rules. I shouldn't have lied, I shouldn't have left, and I'm so sorry but my collar isn't worth your lives, it's just not. I love you both. I'm sorry.
And then I found this. And I have to be honest with you guys, I have to, I think Damon and Penny and Brandon are the only ones who read this and I can't lie to you. He's real, I'm so sorry. A few weeks ago, that wasn't a game that was real and I thought I'd gotten through it, I thought it would go away but when I read that post I turned and He was in the window and I screamed. I knew... I knew I had to leave, I had to save Damon and Penny, because they're good kind people and they've treated me so well and I love them and I don't want this happening to them.
He's real, and I had to run, and I couldn't take Damon and Penny, couldn't TELL Damon and Penny. They know, of course, because I'm not allowed to lie to them, but they haven't seen him yet, they're not being stalked, so there's still hope, so I need to leave. I left with Brandon last night.
Damon, Penny, I'm so sorry. I know I broke the rules. I shouldn't have lied, I shouldn't have left, and I'm so sorry but my collar isn't worth your lives, it's just not. I love you both. I'm sorry.
Thursday, August 4, 2011
The Game
Today was game day. Damon and Penny and I slept in, the game wasn't till four, and we headed out at around noon to get the stuff we needed to set up in the park taken care of, and we went to eat before the game because it was going to run well past dinner. The whole time the three of us were buzzing with anticipation, excitement for things to come.
We took our places at 3, ready with enough premade characters for double the people that had let us know they were coming-just in case. People started arriving pretty shortly after that, and we were relatively occupied until Brandon arrived a little after four. We'd been about to head out and get started, but I'm glad we waited. He's very sweet, if a little misguided. Seemed to think that this whole slenderthing was something more than just a game. He was pretty agitated about it.
I talked him down, though, and got him to come play. He'd never done a LARP before, but he did pretty well, and seemed to have a damn good time. Afterward, he came to talk to me and asked me out. Which, I admit, I was kind of excited about.
Confession time, guys. Damon and Penny aren't just friends, as Brandon noticed. We're dating. The three of us. We're a committed triad, though we all also pick up other partners from time to time. I had to check with them before I accepted Brandon's offer, but I wasn't particularly worried they'd say no. They've been encouraging me to pick up a date-they're both pretty busy most of the time and as I have very little to do during the week, finding someone good to spend some of that time with is definitely not a bad thing.
I probably should've come out and TOLD Brandon, but I thought that telling him I needed to ask permission was pretty obvious. Apparently he didn't figure it out until we kissed, though. At least he doesn't seem to mind? A lot of folks are squicked by polyamory. My family is still weirded out, and the three of us have been together for three years. Though admittedly they're nice about it, so it's not such a big deal.
In any case, I need to go get ready for my date. I'll throw up a post later today about how it went.
We took our places at 3, ready with enough premade characters for double the people that had let us know they were coming-just in case. People started arriving pretty shortly after that, and we were relatively occupied until Brandon arrived a little after four. We'd been about to head out and get started, but I'm glad we waited. He's very sweet, if a little misguided. Seemed to think that this whole slenderthing was something more than just a game. He was pretty agitated about it.
I talked him down, though, and got him to come play. He'd never done a LARP before, but he did pretty well, and seemed to have a damn good time. Afterward, he came to talk to me and asked me out. Which, I admit, I was kind of excited about.
Confession time, guys. Damon and Penny aren't just friends, as Brandon noticed. We're dating. The three of us. We're a committed triad, though we all also pick up other partners from time to time. I had to check with them before I accepted Brandon's offer, but I wasn't particularly worried they'd say no. They've been encouraging me to pick up a date-they're both pretty busy most of the time and as I have very little to do during the week, finding someone good to spend some of that time with is definitely not a bad thing.
I probably should've come out and TOLD Brandon, but I thought that telling him I needed to ask permission was pretty obvious. Apparently he didn't figure it out until we kissed, though. At least he doesn't seem to mind? A lot of folks are squicked by polyamory. My family is still weirded out, and the three of us have been together for three years. Though admittedly they're nice about it, so it's not such a big deal.
In any case, I need to go get ready for my date. I'll throw up a post later today about how it went.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Things Change
Camp this weekend was dire. With Kaylee gone, my entire cabin was in a bad mood. Getting them to smile and laugh was quite a trick, one that I only partially achieved, because I was just as down as they were every time I looked at her empty bunk.
But we managed, and there's only one week left before the camp stops for the summer. It's... Normally I'm really sad when we end for the season, I fall in love with my kids and I hate to see them go, but after what happened last week I'm all nervous around the trees-and we have a lot of them. I hate that whatever happened has corrupted my haven like this. Hopefully by the winter I'll be able to enjoy it again.
In happier news, my game is tomorrow. It's looking like we're going to have a good turn-out, so that'll be fantastic. Damon and Penny and I are getting together this afternoon to do the last minute stuff we need to get done for tomorrow. Any of you reading this that are planning to show, you're in for something amazing.
I'll see you then!
But we managed, and there's only one week left before the camp stops for the summer. It's... Normally I'm really sad when we end for the season, I fall in love with my kids and I hate to see them go, but after what happened last week I'm all nervous around the trees-and we have a lot of them. I hate that whatever happened has corrupted my haven like this. Hopefully by the winter I'll be able to enjoy it again.
In happier news, my game is tomorrow. It's looking like we're going to have a good turn-out, so that'll be fantastic. Damon and Penny and I are getting together this afternoon to do the last minute stuff we need to get done for tomorrow. Any of you reading this that are planning to show, you're in for something amazing.
I'll see you then!
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Camp
I've been debating on whether to say anything about this here, because it's kind of private, but I don't have a whole lot of readers and most of the ones I do have will go away as soon as they figure out that this isn't a gaming post. I need to get this out SOMEWHERE.
I work at a weekends-only camp for kids with terminal diseases-cancer, mostly, but we have all types here. I love working with the kids, and if it is a little depressing thinking of how many of them aren't going to make it, I try and make up for that with remembering that I'm brightening their lives.
This is my third year working at the camp, and honestly it's the only reason I came back to Tampa this year instead of doing summer school like most of my friends. The credit hours I get are nice, and as pediatric nursing is my chosen field I love the experience I get.
That's... that's not the problem part. The problem is with one of my campers. A little eight year old I'll call Kaylee. The first weekend I found her crying in her bunk and took her for a walk to cheer her up, and ever since, she's been my best friend among the kids. She has a heart defect, and before she got to camp she'd never really been allowed to run and play outside for fear of overexerting herself. She loves it, and she's always SO EXCITED to arrive Friday afternoon.
Saturday night she was feeling rather down so I took her for another walk before lights out. I remember the two of us leaving and laughing as we strolled into the woods, and then I remember her being on the ground and frantically calling everyone to help as I tried to keep her heart going. I wish I could remember what happened to give her problems.
She's in the hospital now, and she's in bad shape, but she'll last a while longer. It got her bumped up the transplant list, which is good, if scary. I went to see her this morning, and she seemed terrified. Wouldn't talk about what happened, said she didn't want to go back to camp. It's probably nothing-odds are high she hallucinated when she went down due to a lack of oxygen to the brain. If it were something scary, it would explain everything.
But still. I worry. It just doesn't feel quite right, and I don't know why
I work at a weekends-only camp for kids with terminal diseases-cancer, mostly, but we have all types here. I love working with the kids, and if it is a little depressing thinking of how many of them aren't going to make it, I try and make up for that with remembering that I'm brightening their lives.
This is my third year working at the camp, and honestly it's the only reason I came back to Tampa this year instead of doing summer school like most of my friends. The credit hours I get are nice, and as pediatric nursing is my chosen field I love the experience I get.
That's... that's not the problem part. The problem is with one of my campers. A little eight year old I'll call Kaylee. The first weekend I found her crying in her bunk and took her for a walk to cheer her up, and ever since, she's been my best friend among the kids. She has a heart defect, and before she got to camp she'd never really been allowed to run and play outside for fear of overexerting herself. She loves it, and she's always SO EXCITED to arrive Friday afternoon.
Saturday night she was feeling rather down so I took her for another walk before lights out. I remember the two of us leaving and laughing as we strolled into the woods, and then I remember her being on the ground and frantically calling everyone to help as I tried to keep her heart going. I wish I could remember what happened to give her problems.
She's in the hospital now, and she's in bad shape, but she'll last a while longer. It got her bumped up the transplant list, which is good, if scary. I went to see her this morning, and she seemed terrified. Wouldn't talk about what happened, said she didn't want to go back to camp. It's probably nothing-odds are high she hallucinated when she went down due to a lack of oxygen to the brain. If it were something scary, it would explain everything.
But still. I worry. It just doesn't feel quite right, and I don't know why
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Going As Planned
Planning and prop making is going well, if perhaps a bit more expensively than I would have liked. It's a good thing I've been working at the camp all summer, otherwise this would completely destroy my budget. It's worth it, though, to know that I've really gone full out for this. I'm really excited and I know my players are going to have a blast.
And yes, I actually have players for certain! The emails are coming in now, so far I have four. Two veterans, two newbies, but it's a new system so everyone starts on even footing. There's still plenty of time before game so I'm hoping I'll have at least double that.
Anyway, lots to do getting ready to leave town in a few weeks and also go work the camp this weekend.
And yes, I actually have players for certain! The emails are coming in now, so far I have four. Two veterans, two newbies, but it's a new system so everyone starts on even footing. There's still plenty of time before game so I'm hoping I'll have at least double that.
Anyway, lots to do getting ready to leave town in a few weeks and also go work the camp this weekend.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Work, work, work
Been hard at work making props and plans and such for the Slenderverse LARP, which is why I haven't been around much. Damon and I have never hosted an event like this, and while we have the experience to make it amazing, we're still both nervous and determined to make it especially good, to prove ourselves.
Any of you silent readers who follow me while waiting for the game, know that we've got some amazing things planned for all of you.
And Damon, I know you're reading this. Stop being a lurker bastard. Comments would be appreciated.
Any of you silent readers who follow me while waiting for the game, know that we've got some amazing things planned for all of you.
And Damon, I know you're reading this. Stop being a lurker bastard. Comments would be appreciated.
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
The Rules
Right. Enough with the panicking. Apparently there's an eldrich horror on my tail that wants me to start doing... things for him. I have news for him. I'm not going. I don't hurt people and I don't help other people hurt them either. I'm not going.
In the spirit of that, I'm going to put up some rules of horror to remind myself and enlighten you all. Maybe taking some control of the situation will make the whispering GO AWAY.
First. Avoid basements, cornfields, small towns in the middle of nowhere that you've never been to before, creepy woods, and abandoned houses. If you MUST go to any of these places, make sure to bring friends, stay close together, and don't stay after dark for any reason. Particularly relevant to this is the small town and woods section of this. I don't want to run into any slendycults.
Second. While it is tempting to allow the situation to distance you from friends, family, and the rest of humanity, either make it a clean break and get the fuck out of there or stay close. Emotional distance without physical distance just puts them in more danger-because then you have the heartbreaking 'I never got to tell them I loved them' situation.
Third. Don't tempt fate. Seriously. Don't be that guy. You know the one. Don't say 'surely we must be safe HERE' or 'We can hold out till morning' or anything similar. The shit hits the fan immediately afterward. And everyone hates that guy for starting it.
Fourth. Remember. This is an eldrich horror. Do not be the idiot who rushes it with a sword. That always ends badly-for the swordsman.There is no fighting, hiding is iffy at best, you have to run. And keep running. Slendy doesn't give up the hunt.
...I'm going to start getting stuff together to run. I'm glad I have some money put away from working all year.
In the spirit of that, I'm going to put up some rules of horror to remind myself and enlighten you all. Maybe taking some control of the situation will make the whispering GO AWAY.
First. Avoid basements, cornfields, small towns in the middle of nowhere that you've never been to before, creepy woods, and abandoned houses. If you MUST go to any of these places, make sure to bring friends, stay close together, and don't stay after dark for any reason. Particularly relevant to this is the small town and woods section of this. I don't want to run into any slendycults.
Second. While it is tempting to allow the situation to distance you from friends, family, and the rest of humanity, either make it a clean break and get the fuck out of there or stay close. Emotional distance without physical distance just puts them in more danger-because then you have the heartbreaking 'I never got to tell them I loved them' situation.
Third. Don't tempt fate. Seriously. Don't be that guy. You know the one. Don't say 'surely we must be safe HERE' or 'We can hold out till morning' or anything similar. The shit hits the fan immediately afterward. And everyone hates that guy for starting it.
Fourth. Remember. This is an eldrich horror. Do not be the idiot who rushes it with a sword. That always ends badly-for the swordsman.There is no fighting, hiding is iffy at best, you have to run. And keep running. Slendy doesn't give up the hunt.
...I'm going to start getting stuff together to run. I'm glad I have some money put away from working all year.
Friday, June 24, 2011
DnD Week!: 4.0
Fourth edition has been highly debated since it came out, in the grand tradition of DnD fanboys and girls everywhere. Every edition isn't as good as the one which came before-especially for the first year or two.
hespeakstome
What fourth edition is best at is random encounters. It's a system that's MADE for one shots and minis-style battles, whatever it lacks in the rest of it's gameplay. If you're looking for good fighting fun, 4th edition might be just the system for you. If not, I'd give it a pass.
hespeakstome
What fourth edition is best at is random encounters. It's a system that's MADE for one shots and minis-style battles, whatever it lacks in the rest of it's gameplay. If you're looking for good fighting fun, 4th edition might be just the system for you. If not, I'd give it a pass.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
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