Wednesday, June 29, 2011

The Rules

Right. Enough with the panicking. Apparently there's an eldrich horror on my tail that wants me to start doing... things for him. I have news for him. I'm not going. I don't hurt people and I don't help other people hurt them either. I'm not going.

In the spirit of that, I'm going to put up some rules of horror to remind myself and enlighten you all. Maybe taking some control of the situation will make the whispering GO AWAY.

First. Avoid basements, cornfields, small towns in the middle of nowhere that you've never been to before, creepy woods, and abandoned houses. If you MUST go to any of these places, make sure to bring friends, stay close together, and don't stay after dark for any reason. Particularly relevant to this is the small town and woods section of this. I don't want to run into any slendycults.

Second. While it is tempting to allow the situation to distance you from friends, family, and the rest of humanity, either make it a clean break and get the fuck out of there or stay close. Emotional distance without physical distance just puts them in more danger-because then you have the heartbreaking 'I never got to tell them I loved them' situation.

Third. Don't tempt fate. Seriously. Don't be that guy. You know the one. Don't say 'surely we must be safe HERE' or 'We can hold out till morning' or anything similar. The shit hits the fan immediately afterward. And everyone hates that guy for starting it.

Fourth. Remember. This is an eldrich horror. Do not be the idiot who rushes it with a sword. That always ends badly-for the swordsman.There is no fighting, hiding is iffy at best, you have to run. And keep running. Slendy doesn't give up the hunt.

...I'm going to start getting stuff together to run. I'm glad I have some money put away from working all year.

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